Babies, Toddlers, motherhood, sleep training, toddlerhood

Go the FUCK to sleep

Seriously, sleep is overrated, right?! Just tell me yes to make me feel better.

My first born was a terrible sleeper from the womb. She was a cluster feeder and she slept in the middle of our bed in the pack n play bassinet. She was our first so naturally, we didn’t to leave her side, especially since she decided that CAMP BOOB was open 24/7. For the love of God, when you are sleep deprived, you actually say things like, “Go the fuck to sleep,” to a little innocent newborn. We decided to do cry it out balls to the wall at about 14 months and it was the best thing ever. Not in the beginning when her little stubborn cute self would cry for an hour and 55 minutes straight, but each day got better and eventually she became a good sleeper. She is now 3 years old, is the master of stalling, but she sleeps great and just transitioned to a big girl bed. She occasionally has what we think are night terrors- where she wakes up dead out of her sleep screaming, eyes rolling, pretty. much a scene from the Exorcist. She recently developed a fear of bugs so most dreams are about bugs coming out the ceiling. When she wakes up screaming, Hudson wakes up screaming. It’s a sick cycle.


Hudson, on the other hand, was a great sleeper from the womb. He slept through the night from day 1 until about 7 months old. He slept in the rock n play and I pumped the shit out of my boobs because the kid slept rock solid for over 10 hours without eating. Second kid, I let him sleep. First one, we tend to wake them every 2-3 hours to make sure they would nurse. Then at 7 months, God decided to charge Hudson up like a crazy bull, but only at night. He was never a cluster feeder and his temperament was always so chill. While it still is pretty chill, he turned into a horrible sleeper. I can’t help but blame myself, but here we are, almost 15 months old and I am ready to sleep train, but when he is crying, she wakes up! Lately, he’s been waking up every 3 hours and the only thing to calm him down is nursing. At about 8 months, Hudson transitioned to a crib in our room and around 11 months, he transitioned into his own room in the crib. The problem is that their rooms are next to each other. We have amazing white noise machines in their rooms, but for the love of God, GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP. He wakes up and wants to nurse and Daddy is a firefighter so I have to run into his room and quiet him down before Jules wakes up. Side note- I have weaned him from nursing in day time for the most part, but he has tried to go up my shirt or nurse while I am holding him upright haha! Also, he won’t take a bottle if I am around and he hates whole milk.

Usually blogs are giving advice, but I need advice. How do I sleep train a 15 month old with a 3 year old? She is a creature of habit (aren’t we all), so she doesn’t like our bed. She LOVED her crib, but we transitioned her to a big girl bed cold turkey and she was ready. The crib was on standby, but as far as Hudson goes, it is so hard waking up every 2-3 hours, nursing him, then trying to settle her down because she had a night terror or she heard Hudson crying. IMG_4373

This mom shit is no joke. I am open to any suggestions. I swear by CIO and I know a lot of people doesn’t agree, but my whole motto is do what works for you and your family. We will sleep again…

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