Trauma

Trauma is like a love language. We have all experienced it in some way or form. Everyone experiences trauma differently. Some swallow it whole and it comes out later on in life, spilling into relationships and other parts. Some experience that “leaky” trauma where it comes out all over the place. Some people block it…

Good Mourning

I get it. It’s spelled wrong. But I’m in the mourning phase of motherhood where I am crying daily that my kids are growing up. That oxytocin is wearing thin and my kids are outgrowing my arms and my lap as I write this. I swear I lie in bed staring at my kids praying…

I miss you

I miss you when you were just born. I miss you when you fit so perfectly in my arms and on my body. I miss when I knew you only had me to give you life. When your little eyes would look up at me when you were nursing. I miss when all you wanted…

I need directions

My daughter is almost 6 and I always knew she was strong willed from the womb. She’s always been a leader, likes to have control, knows what she wants, needs melatonin to sleep, has a ton of energy, thrives with routine and structure, needs to be stimulated and loves to talk and sing- at home.…

Dear Hudson, You are FOUR

Dear Sweet Boy, You are such a blessing to my life and I love watching you grow, but as I always say, it breaks my heart at the same time. Do I pray for you to stay little? Or do I pray you won’t ever struggle or feel pain? I live my life for you…

I’m not an octopus

Juliana and Hudson are my world, if you haven't already got that. But for the love of God, they are so needy, rightfully so. Being 3 and almost 5 is a hard job, trying to navigate your big feelings in this crazy chaotic pandemic of a world. Pandemic or not, being a toddler isn't all…

It pushes on the soul

Have you have had such big feelings that it pushes on your soul? Really really bad ones and really really good ones? I live for those good ones- the ones that make your soul jump into your heart. When you first find out you’re pregnant. When you first fall in love. When you’re with your…

I am

I am strong. I am sensitive. I am beautiful. I am allowed to feel EVERY emotion and not feel guilty. I am selfless and I will not let anyone tell me otherwise, no matter who you are. And if you are in my circle and you think I am not, then I have the power…

Dear Hudson

Today you are 3. Today you are my little boy instead of my baby and that makes me sad. But I swear to God I will always call you my baby forever and ever even when you hate it. Thank you for being my calm in this storm of life. I’m sorry that it was…

It’s all too much

How are you doing mamas? I am not well and I will admit it. As most of you know, I consider this my safe place to vent- a platform for mamas to share the good things, the bad things, and everything in between. We are living in an unprecedented time, a time where we have…